X a student who liked to be picky teman.Ia easy to see the lack of friends and people who do not label as well. And then he avoided friends with that person. After a long time he did not have any friends because everyone has a flaw in the eyes of X. Finally X lonely.
Human beings are often said to be a never satisfied with something that has or on others. Humans often do not convict people better if you find the things he disliked. Are you also include someone who has character like this?
Meaning behind A Tale
Before we discuss this, first I would ask you do you ever watch or read the fairy tale Beauty & the Beast berjudu or movie called Shrek? If you've never seen it, about what lessons can you capture the fairy tale Beauty & the Beast or a movie called Shrek? You would know if a fairy tale Beauty & the Beast tells the story of the beautiful who are willing to accept the ugly as it is, finally the turn into the ugly-looking. What exactly is the meaning of the fairy tale Beauty & the beast? Some people see that the ugly can be turned into a handsome prince. When analyzed more deeply, one message from the fairy tale beauty & the beast, and the like that the human perception of the weakness of others can change if you find the positive side / kindness. And the film which tells the story of Shrek Shrek the Giant romance with the beautiful princess would like to extend that true love will accept others as they are.
If we reflect ourselves, have we become people who are willing to accept others as they really are and more to see the advantages possessed by another person? It can not be denied if at this time most people prefer to insult and denounce someone because of flaws and blemishes or mistakes ever made. Insult and reproach as though it was a culture. Most people still like to find someone else rather than see the lack of advantages.
Sources of dissatisfaction in Others
There is dissatisfaction is a positive, because we are trying to make the better or not do actions that cause problems and dissatisfaction. But there is dissatisfaction with the negative, which is destructive because it is based on hatred, envy, jealousy and the desire to destroy / defeat the other party. For example, we do not like the neighbors bought a large flat screen TV, we also want to have a bigger again until the debt is strangling the neck.
Human dissatisfaction is not just limited to property or goods owned, but also in interpersonal relationships. Now according to Gunadi (2004) the factors that can be a source of human discontent in others, among other physical factors. Shape and posture and presence of disability into one factor for the source of dissatisfaction in interpersonal relationships. There are people who prefer to mix with people that the ideal posture, his face handsome / beautiful, looks cool. It has become common knowledge. Otherwise, people will not be competing to improve their looks. Second, temperament. There are people who are not satisfied when communicating with people who are taciturn, morose, pessimistic people, resigned to the fact, otherwise there who do not feel like interacting with the cheerful and active. Some other factors that influence the culture, religion, education, and age.
Psychologically, we express dissatisfaction at the other people are basically self-sourced. Why? One of the factors causing the self-righteousness (see others bad, and yourself better), this is a pattern of abusive foster parents who tend to be either verbal, emotional or physical. Thus parents more often criticizing, insulting, disparaging the child rather than giving credit for the excess or the ability of the child. And even though the child had tried to optimal as possible, praise and recognition from parents not being given. Such a child is growing up with the belief that he was not good enough person and fear of rejection is often overshadowed by the environment. Many people like this in our society. They are racing to get recognition, to reach the high standards that are not clear and vice versa, putting the demands that are not rational, either to ourselves or to others.
In such situations, people more sensitive to rejection and ketidakterlibatan perceive himself as a confirmation that he was not good enough, while there are other people better than him. Such a person will easily feel threatened by the presence of others so that interpersonal relations can not be interwoven with an open, warm and colored sincerity. Each person is in an unhealthy climate of competition, mutual suspicion and tried searching for the lack of others to secure herself a position.
Solutions
How do we achieve satisfaction in interpersonal relationships with others? Actually, there are some things we can do to make interpersonal relationship between us and others are more qualified and have a meaning, namely:
* Recognizing that every human being endowed with the uniqueness of different, depending on the vocation of each
* Respect for the inherent uniqueness of others and appreciate the uniqueness, talent and potential that God bestowed on us.
* Be empathetic to other people and see problems and challenges of life to be lived.
* Seeing the advantages others in the broad context, linked with the history of life in the past and the journey The journey of life that will in the future, and assigned responsibilities. By looking at large, we avoid the attitude of envy and jealousy to see the advantages of others.
* Not just from looking at other people's physical appearance, but on the quality of his (heart, honesty, ability, expertise, quality work, achievement, wisdom, etc.)
* Give a sincere love for others, not pretending to receive a reply.
* Avoid want to master and control the behavior of others.
* Apply an attitude of mutual respect and tolerance in everyday life.
* Frequently introspection so that we do not have to look for deficiencies of others.
* Try to love others as you love yourself. People who hate themselves, it would be difficult to love his neighbor.
Hopefully this discussion, can be a drop of water can help treat dissatisfaction in others.
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